Category Archives: The Great Debates of Horror

The Great Debates of Horror

The Great Debates of Horror: Special Effects (Pro CGI FX)

Author: Lee Medcalf

Posted by: Root Rot


In Defense Of CGI. – Don’t Blame The Tools Blame The Workman

Hands up, how many of you have been deep in a discussion about your favourite movie only to be presented with an opposing view that runs along the lines of “But the special FX were rubbish! The CGI was so bad!”

I’d guess 100% of you have had this conversation or a variation of it. But is CGI really that bad? Is it really the bane of modern film making and more pertinently is it really worse than some of the visual FX we were subjected to prior to its arrival in the 90s?

Now before I start, full disclosure from the off, I am a VFX artist and have worked with some big companies such as Lucas film, Cartoon Network and some not so big, anyone remember the British publicly funded 1999 SF movie Legionnaires that never saw the light of day? No, thought not. However, my job does not bias my view that CGI is a truly fantastic film making tool and unfairly derided as the reason films are, for the most part, bland and uninteresting eye candy.

Since it exploded on to the cinematic landscape with some extremely high profile tests in quick succession (The Abyss in 1989, Terminator 2 in 1991 and Jurassic Park in 1993) CGI has enhanced the world of movies, presenting us with imagery that is, frankly, impossible to recreate convincingly by physical means. But like any tool, it can be over used and more than anything I believe it’s this ubiquity that is the actual problem for most movie audiences.

Let us take a look at the standard arguments;

CGI is unconvincing.

This is such a subjective argument and one that relies on a number of factors, least of all your emersion in the film itself, if you’re not convinced by the story line, the characters, the poor plotting, the editing, the script, the acting, its fair to say the CGI moments aren’t going to win you over no matter what they show. Also let’s think about this for a second, if someone shows you a 500ft monster like the beasts in Cloverfield or the upcoming Skyline, you’re never going to be convinced ever. After all, subconsciously you know such a thing couldn’t possibly exist. But on a purely technical level and removing the rose tinted specs for a moment be honest and ask yourself one thing. How convinced have you ever been about any monster you’ve seen on screen? Sure Willis Obrien’s King Kong was a fantastic achievement for the time, but more convincing than Peter Jackson’s version? Seriously, if you find someone who can legitimately back that opinion up, then get them into a rehab clinic because they’re on crack!

CGI is easy to spot.

Well is it really? Referring to point 1, it’s never going to be hard to spot the big CGI monster nor is it particularly tough to point out that gargantuan spaceship rolling overhead is CGI… I mean really, it doesn’t take Sherlock Holmes to divine these from the pictures on screen. But, then look at something like Sex and the City 2! There were twenty six visual FX people on that job and a further nine special FX technicians, but where was the obvious CGI there? Similarly, Children of Men’s dystopian future used was created by two visual FX companies, Framestore and Double Negative and I defy you to spot even 50% of the shots they worked on and yes the baby is fully CG.

So ultimately, my point here is a comment like “CGI is easy to spot” is as patently obvious as saying, animatronic creatures or matte paintings are easy to spot. Hell, look at the first forty minutes of Return of the Jedi which looks like a hellish version of the Muppet Show. Pointing at that and saying “Hey I can see the puppets” its clearly a ridiculous statement and no more a valid criticism of the medium than looking at the T-Rex in Jurassic Park and saying “Hey that’s CG look how obvious it is!”

CGI is badly done.

Okay this one is a particular bugbear of mine; How, precisely is it badly done? The “badly done” comment is one that baffles me, because last time I looked most people who make those comments wouldn’t know one end of a copy of Autodesk Maya from another. In fairness, I understand when a shot is so obviously unfinished that it stands out like a sore thumb, but the question at this point becomes one of semantics. You see, CGI in this case is 3D visual FX and as already discussed, the shot can just be plain obviously not real by dint of the fact you’re seeing something that couldn’t possibly be real. However, there are a number of other factors that will make a shot stand out as badly done which have little baring on the quality of the CG itself. Colour grading, a process which effectively ensures, things like darker colours are all the same tone can heavily affect the look of a shot. Compositing, the gathering of all the shot elements and sticking them together in one frame also can affect the shot. There are a thousand little things that can make that CG monster stand out in the wrong way, but for the most part it is not actually the CG itself that is at fault. If your object has shadows that have a tint of green in them and the director changes the shot to a sunny day in the desert then of course the object is going to stand out like a sore thumb.

That said, none of this is taken into account by Joe Public, they just notice the shot and instantly its “badly done” which is a lazy catch all sweeping statement and by that measure, the Blaine creature at the end of The Thing is also “badly done” because the stop motion was easily spotted and the colour grade suddenly makes all the snow become a weird shade of gray.

CG lacks the “soul” of older visual FX work
One word for you; Gollum.

More words? Okay, there is a theory that the closer visual FX comes to reality the more the mind subconsciously rebels against the image on screen. It’s a theory called “the uncanny valley”. So when you see something clearly unreal in a real setting, your mind rejects the image as being fake or somehow dead inside. Our brains perceive billions of tiny nuances that CG is slowly replicating and getting better at it, but until that day, you’ll see a CG human and reject it as an effect because of that lack of subtlety. But before you jump up and shout “Aha! And that’s why CGI is bobbins” lets just stop you there. Take a look at the notorious chestburster scene from Alien, sure the acting from John Hurt was amazingly convincing, as was Veronica Cartrights scream at a face full of blood, but the creature itself? Once it scooted across the Nostromos dinner table it was clearly an unconvincing sock puppet. Similarly Gigers adult creature in the same film only succeeded in not looking like “a bloke in a suit” thanks to Ridley Scotts efforts to keep it hidden and filmed close up. Another example is the “eye repair” scene from The Terminator when Arnie is checking out his terminator eye in the mirror after plopping out his human eye, the T800’s head is about as real as a shop dummy. Arnie pops up again in Total Recall in the shot when he removes the fat lady mask in Mars airport customs, if you think that lumpy wonky thing looked anything like Schwartzenegger or portrayed any kind of life in those eyes I would like a hit of whatever you’re smoking there.

All of his nitpicking amounts to one very big point, that CGI is not better or worse than physical effects. Like anything, it is a tool, one that is prone to over use or misuse but is not the cinematic boogyman everyone would have you believe. For every awful Jar Jar Binks or Licker from Resident Evil crapping on the CGI world, there is an equivalent physical effect that proves animatronics can be just as bad, if not worse, when similarly abused. Yet, what gives physical models and animatronics a pass is their place in history and the accompanied rose tinted specs of the viewer.

For example, to this day there are millions of fans of Toho’s Godzilla, which is clearly a man in suit rampaging around a model village, who will swear night is day that the creature is more convincing than the one in the US remake. Something that is almost entirely down to the fans perception of the lacklustre film, rather than the quality of the effects which, when looked at objectively, are infinitely superior to the original which was something that has the production values of an average YouTube clip. And in many ways it’s this lack of objective standpoint, which remains CGI biggest downfall, the modern day equivalent of your parents or grandparents wistfully reminiscing how things were better in their day, yet ignoring the all the negative things of their time.

As a film goer, I am constantly astounded by the FX work in modern films and TV, regardless of the final product and feel that there is no difference between sitting there in the theatre gawping at something emotionally hollow yet visually spectacular as, say, Michael Bay’s Transformers and sitting there mouth agape at John Carpenters The Thing. The true difference in those films comes down to the utilisation of the tools at hand and the quality of the film making.

In the final analysis, who cares how these images are created as long as they work well and are used for a reason of storytelling instead of the only reason for the films existence.

CGI is not the death knell of creative film making, quite the opposite. Its empowering film makers to work without constraint, and without the technology, some of the finest films in the past 15 years could not have been realised so strikingly, all it needs now is some maturity to utilise it effectively.


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The Great Debates of Horror: Special Effects (Pro Physical FX)

Written by: Eric R. Lowther

Admittedly, I’m an old man. When I watch horror movies, I increasingly find myself the equivalent of the codger on the lawn in his ratty bathrobe, shaking his fist at speeding cars and telling kids they have it too soft these days. But that’s the thing about old men; they often have insight bred from experience and zero filters left on what they say and how loudly they say it. It is from this experience, and my lack of filters, that I feel qualified to argue the “pro-physical/largely anti-CGI FX” side of the debate.


CGI as a crutch

Unlike many film genres, modern horror can rarely get away without having some sort of special effects. Many of us codgers point back to the Universal monster movies, Hammer films and countless others and say “they didn’t need computers and multi-million dollar FX budgets to make a (good, subject to taste) horror film”. Granted, I’m opening up a whole can of worms here in regards to discussions and debates on the desensitization of the general public to violence and visceral imagery. It can also be said that we inhabitants of Today are far too sophisticated an audience to suspend our disbelief for the zipper-up-the-back or the sheet strategically thrown over the monster. However, since these movies of the golden age in most cases couldn’t show us their real vision of the “monster” and/or its aftermath, whether from lack of ability or censorship they had to make up for it with atmosphere, acting ability and production designing. The lack of big effects forced the creators to engage us through the story, and their use of misdirection and shadow forced us to imagine things that were far worse than anything they could’ve put on the screen. Today’s burgeoning low-budget and indie horror film market is a great thing to see, with technological advances in digital recording and editing taking a huge portion of a shooting budget off the table. The drawback to that is the easy-to-use, cheap software they often utilize to create their digital effects and the huge temptation to use these effects to save even more money over using physical effects. The relative ease of constructing poor-quality CGI also creates a siren song to the filmmaker desperate to pad the length of his project with very little cash. In short, easy-to-create CGI is very, very often bad CGI. Poorly-rendered blood spatters, weapon strikes and gunshots/bullet hits, exploding parts and pieces and, the worst offender, bad on-actor CGI additions have become the modern equivalent of the zipper and sheet. The difference, though, is that at least with zippers and sheets your imagination still had something to work with and a blank to fill in. And while well-done CGI can often enhance this, poorly-done genre CGI (which is far more the norm and much less the exception) doesn’t even allow that, preferring to force-feed your imagination with its substandard images.


CGI removes vitality from an actor’s performance

How many times have you heard interviews with actors about their horror movies? One of the questions that always comes up is; “Were you scared of the zombies/vampires/werewolves/ pack of Justin Bieber clones (okay, they haven’t made that one yet, but I’m waiting patiently) while shooting?” Those in even decent movies with even decent special effects will have at least one story to tell about being scared out of their minds during the filming of this scene or that. Now think about some interviews and DVD extras you’ve seen where the actors are on a barren soundstage in front of a green-screen looking up at a tennis ball and screaming. Physical effects, even when poorly done, are there with the actors in real-time. Flying blood and bits obey the laws of physics and another actor in full, bloody regalia baring down on them often gets past the “I’m an actor in a movie” mentality during that initial and crucial moment in the film, and no matter how poorly done allow the actor to more fully use the event in their portrayal instead of being told “…you get shot here, react… now!”, or “…look at this tennis ball and act really, really afraid…


Ready availability of poor CGI makes filmmakers overreach

Back in the stop-motion animation days, the viewing audience, even those that weren’t particularly tech savvy, knew and understood the limitations of the special effects of the day. The viewers of Today, however, have largely been duped into believing that anyone with a computer and some time on their hands can create “Transformers”. Note to Michael Bay, this is not to encourage you to make yet another one of these just because your name was mentioned. The bulk of movie-goers have been bred to believe computers can be made to do anything, from a hacker changing traffic light patterns across a major metropolis to creating stunning and seamless visual effects. Unfortunately, filmmakers are often a part of this mindset and think the audience will forgive them when they try to show major plane crashes, devastated cityscapes and hordes of monsters et al through cheap CGI. To the low-budget/indie filmmaker; just because you can do a thing doesn’t mean you should do that thing, and a filmmaker using poor CGI to try and show me something his budget just won’t allow him to render either through physical effects or very good CGI is only taking me right the fuck out of his story. If you can’t show an airliner crashing with some very good CGI, don’t try to show it to me. Tell me about it through the actor’s dialog and show me the aftermath with the injured and ragged survivors of the crash as they stumble away from the site. Don’t tell me your characters are using automatic rifles and then use bad CGI to make me think they’re firing them (hint to filmmakers, when the breach is physically locked open the gun doesn’t fire. Please, pay attention. Your audience is.). I’d rather see you reduce your scope, tighten up your script and give me a good story then I would to see the thing that I’m sure has occupied your everyday life for the last year fall apart because you just had to try and show me a fleet of poorly-rendered alien ships or a twelve foot tall Cthulu-inspired monster and completely remove me from your tale. I want to work with you, I want to see your vision. However, I also don’t want you to feel that your status as an “independent artist”, your lack of a budget and your reliance on bad CGI gives you permission to insult my intelligence. If you’re going to put it on the screen, either spend the money to properly integrate your CGI or make my imagination work for it. Be honest with me about your budget limitations, then wow me with how your solid script and hungry, here-to-fore unknown actors and no-name physical effects guys just skip right over your budget woes and tell your story.


CGI takes the “special” out of Special Effects

No matter how “good” a film’s CGI effects come out, I’m always left with a sort of empty feeling. While the visual presentation may be stunning, in the back of my mind I’m always picturing some poor schmuck that put in four years at college to become a graphics designer or commercial artist just sitting in front of a computer for twelve hours adjusting this pixel or that frame for barely above minimum wage (Google it… the workaday CGI artist typically works for a contract company manipulating a second or so of film a day). When I see physical effects, even bad ones, I know there were a bunch of people on the set like hair, make-up, the effects crew, director and actors all working together to make the thing happen. They were likely laughing with each other, screaming at each other, and, when the camera rolled and the effect came off, enjoying that sense of accomplishment with each other. And if they did it right, I can’t help but be infected by that spirit. Ask Tom Savini, “Hey, how in the hell did you guys pull off that helicopter rotor/zombie scene in Dawn of the Dead?” If you’ve paid the fee for the meet n greet or bought a few autographs, he’ll most likely smile a little even now as he remembers the moment that effect paid off and may even give you a sound bite about it as his people usher you away for the next paying customer… er… fan. Ask the cube dweller about the 2 ½ seconds of a film that took up fourteen hours a day for three weeks of his life and he’s likely to throw something sharp and pointy at you. This may be rather esoteric, but the people who do physical effects by and large absolutely love what they do. And when you love your art it can’t help but show through in the finished product.

Well, that’s my take on the subject, and many thanks to Root Rot for giving me the opportunity to air my views. If you have comments, questions or flaming puppies to send my way please feel free to leave a comment or send to ericrlowther@yahoo.com. Also, check out my blog at http://ericrlowther.blogspot.com for some free short fiction and my dubious pedigree. Until then, I’ll give this back to Root Rot. I’m going back out on the lawn. There’s this kid in a souped-up Honda Civic that’s been doing 26 mph in my 25 mph zone and the paperboy has tossed the damn thing into the hedges again…


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The Great Debates of Horror: Horror Movie Remakes (Pro Remake)

Author: Stephen

Posted by: Root Rot


Remakes are a fact of life in today’s entertainment world. In fact, this very article which you are now reading is a remake of a piece I wrote for the Corpse Collective website. No other genre of movie seems to be as afflicted by remake fever as the horror genre. And while many horror fans bemoan this trend, the simple fact is that the horror remake has become the lifeblood of the genre.

Movie studios are not charitable organizations. The horror genre is the most profitable genre of them all, and the franchise and remake allow the studios to maximize their profits. In 2003 the major studios spent an average of about $34 million dollars per release in marketing. But horror and science fiction movies are unique in that the fans are often greatly involved in getting the word out on behalf of the studios through dozens of magazines, websites, and podcasts. Romantic comedy doesn’t have this same network to promote their offerings. Add to that the name recognition of a certified brand like “Friday the 13th” or “Nightmare on Elm Street,” and you can get more exposure for less overhead, and thus greater profits. And, believe it or not, profit is the name of the game.

Movie making is a risky business. What other product costs millions of dollars to make and has no guaranteed profit margin? It only makes sense to rely on known quantities, domestic or foreign. If the Japanese are afraid of something, then odds are that we can take that same concept and make it scary for Americans. Are we so different from the Swedes or the Spanish that we have completely different anxieties? Of course not. Fear is universal, and if we know a concept scares the Europeans or the Asians, then it will likely scare Americans, once we dumb it down a bit and add an actor on hiatus from a CW network melodrama.

In the case of our franchise characters, the question becomes is it better to just add a new installment or remake the original. Unfortunately, continuity becomes a grave issue to fanboys, and a hindrance to the writing process. The writers of each installment have, in their autonomy, already introduced so many disparate elements into the mythology of the franchise characters that there is little left to do with the characters except have them travel through time and stalk cavemen. Where do you take Jason Vorhees after he’s been to Hell, Outer Space, and New York? How do you evolve Freddy Kruger after he has already become the vessel for a demon and a post-modern incarnation of himself? How much time can the Leprechan spent in “da hood?” These characters have gone so far afield from their original concepts that the only logical thing to do is chuck it all and start over.

The remake makes the stories more accessible to a younger generation. Hell, I don’t even try to watch a movie if I’ve missed the first five minutes. Imagine trying to jump in if you’ve missed the first 30 years of the story. Only the truly dedicated are going to go back and watch 10 installments of a series so they are on the same page as the characters. The rest are going to look at the indecipherable large roman numeral behind the title and, unable to make a word out of it, say “fuck it.”

What of the younger generation of moviegoers, or Generation Bumfuck, as I like to call them? The adage is the more things change, the more they stay the same. Just as a lot of my generation will not watch a black and white movie, today’s generation is not going to go back and revisit the horror of their fathers. However, a solid concept that was profitable 30 years ago will play again to a younger audience. It just needs to be tweaked to the sensibilities of the new audience. They will show up for the same reasons we did oh so many years ago, and we older fans go for the same reasons we went the first time around.

Thus far the case in favor of remakes has been a fiscal one. What about artistic integrity? Seriously? Tell Santa Claus I said “hi” when you see him.

Remakes are nothing new. Alfred Hitchcock’s “The Lodger” was a silent movie from 1927 about Jack the Ripper, and has been remade at least 4 times (and as recently as 2009). The amazing thing about this is that the 1944 is considered by many to be superior to Mr. Hitchcock’s original, in large part thanks to Laird Cregar’s performance. If Hitchcock can be outdone, then surely there’s a chance that George Mihalka’s work can be bested. And while we are on the subject of Hitchcock, he did a remake of his own “The Man Who Knew Too Much.” So a good remake can be made, in the right hands. In fact, the odds are that the remake can surpass the original, as the new filmmaker has the opportunity to assess any flaws of the original and remove them, while keeping what worked. Again, in the right hands.

Finally, and here’s where I have to tread lightly… were the originals of these movies so great that they couldn’t stand improvement? In a few rare cases, yes. But, is “House on Sorority Row” so sacred that it should never be touched? Of course not. I love the Friday the 13th franchise, but be totally objective and name one movie in the series that is actually a good film. I can’t. It’s like being the parent of a butt-ugly child.

Times change and sensibilities change so why not take a concept that works and adapt it for a different audience? Some people will not watch foreign movies, so why not take a solid story and make it accessible to the natives? The worst case scenario is that the remake is a waste of time. But what if the remake does succeed? What if it generates significant interest in the original? I kinda like having two very different, very entertaining “Dawn of the Dead”s to choose between. The fact that the “Day of the Dead” remake blows 4 goats in a septic tank doesn’t diminish my appreciation for the original at all, so why the hell not? If anything it serves to prop up the value of the original by comparison.

In short, the lower marketing overhead of a horror remake allows for more potential profits. Updating a known quantity reduces risk. It’s just good business. As long as business is good, then we horror fans will continue to get more horror movies. And isn’t that what we want?


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The Great Debates of Horror: Horror Movie Remakes (Anti Remake)

Author: Jonny T

Posted by: Root Rot


Well now, How many of you remember these titles and loved them?

Child’s Play(1988),

Hellraiser(1987),

An american werewolf in london(1981),

Fright Night(1985),

The Fury(1978),

The Howling(1981),

Let the right one in(2008),

The Birds(1963),

The Brood(1979),

Bride Of Frankenstein(1935),

Yes,You guessed it,all of these have been given the”Green light”For remakes.I was trawling through the internet and found these titles wich are just a hand full,needless to say there are many,many more and i gave up counting when i got to 49!

It now seem that everything in the eye’s of big studio’s is now eligible for a re-make or re-boot or re-imagining,all in all its a pretty poor state of affairs.

The leaders in this field seems to be”Platinum Dunes”With Micheal”mega bucks”Bay at the helm,although saying that from the box office success of remakes the like of”Friday 13th”and”A Nightmare on Elm street”every studio large and small are jumping on the bandwagon.

I have thought about this and tried(in vain)to get my head around why/what and if these need to be remade and my conclusion is a firm NO.Myself like a lot of people have of course watched many a remake and been bored and some times even extremely pissed off at what the film makers have been allowed to do with the original source material and basically screw it up,if someone were to re-paint “The Mona Lisa”and give her blonde hair would anybody take notice or even give a shit?I think not!The trouble you have nowadays with the movie going population is that its such a reflection on our quick fix society that what ever “Rom-com”or whatever else the masses go to see there will be trailers for these new “remakes” and many a person will be like”ooo that looks scary!”so make the film short the 30mins etc and you will fill the seats with the people who go out to see whatever is showing without any regard or interest in the original source material and with the attention span of a goldfish,If you are a director and make anything over 2hrs and with subtitles you better hope for good dvd sales!It happens time and time again in my local”multiplex”cinema,it seems the interesting films always have only 2 late night showing and are only on for a week.Very poor!

I can see however the re-make/re-boot idea when it’s done properly and not ripped straight from the original films such as scene for scene dreadful re-makes like”Quarantine”and”Psycho” When you have re-makes/re-boots such as John Carpenters “The Thing”or Zak Snyders”Dawn of the Dead”Then the original material is there but only loosely structured around the originals and not some smart ass director trying to take his ideas whilst keeping everything from the original still in there.

So we trawl on and will do looking at the list above for many years to come with re-makes,whether its lack of investment in new artists or fear of box office failure or the original directors/writers failing career just cashing in on their one great moment we may never probably know,I just really hope that they don’t make a huge mess of”An American werewolf in london”as it’s one of my favourites of all time,maybe hollywood should just”Stick to the paths”.

Jonny t.

 

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The Great Debates of Horror: Walking Zombies vs Running Zombies (Pro Runners)

Author: Stephen 

Posted by: Root Rot


The Running Zombie
In order to remain relevant, ideas must evolve. In the case of Zombies, this means they have to pick up the pace. While the great shambling hordes of yesterday were fine for terrifying Baby Boomers (aka the slowest generation) and made for the perfect metaphor for Romero’s socio-political statements, they just don’t have the same impact today. While it is true that the short attention span of today’s youth would make them easy fodder for slow moving Zombies- my son would probably forget there was an undead apocalypse occurring long enough to be eaten- but I’ve got the job of showing that running Zombies are better, so that’s what I am going to do.

To begin with, slow Zombies are just so old fashioned, and have been out of vogue for years. The peak of most trends can be marked by the moment that they become fodder for parody. This would mark the end of the traditional Zombie movie at about 1985, with the release of Return of the Living Dead. Just as Abbott and Costello killed the era of Universal monsters, O’Bannon and crew shot the traditional Zombie in the head and made them the subject of ridicule. Not only that, these Zombies could run and talk.

Another sign of the end of the Golden Age of Zombies would have to be the incorporation of the Zombie into the mainstream culture. Nowhere is this more evident than Michael Jackson’s Thriller video. While Jackson would later make other things terrifying again such as plastic surgery, the quirky babysitter, and being a white guy, his break-dancing Zombies made the living dead seem as threatening as… well, as threatening as Michael Jackson. Certainly creepy, but not really a threat to anyone over the age of twelve.

Regardless of if you place the beginning of the Zombie era at 1932 with White Zombie, 1959′s Plan 9 From Outer Space (I do), 1964′s Last Man on Earth (Romero does), or Romero’s 1968 classic Night of the Living Dead (most everyone else does), by 1980 it was time for a change, even if it was just for the sake of showing us something we hadn’t seen before in the sub-genre. While even I say it’s a little bit of a stretch for Umberto Lenzi to show us Zombies driving cars (baby steps, Umberto. Baby steps), at least we were starting to see the Zombies do something besides walk and eat. Even Romero would soon have his undead using guns, pumping gas, and hating Vloggers in an attempt to keep his Zombies relevant… even if his films no longer were.

Relevance aside, let’s just get right down to the most important point. If I, as a two-pack a day, overweight, middle-aged asthmatic can evade a threat by jogging, how much of a threat is it really? Sure, they will get me eventually, but so will cancer. Depending of course on how well I have planned for the coming undead apocalypse, I can survive for an indeterminate amount of time against an enemy that is weak, slow, and mindless. Even if I am taken completely by surprise, I can buy time by just putting a little distance between myself and my pursuers. Not so against a fast Zombie.

Here’s a simple test. Which list contains the deadlier animals?
LIST A: Lion, Tiger, Cobra, Cheetah, Wolf, Shark, Killer Rabbit
LIST B: Cow, Sloth, Turtle, Snail, Elderly Human

Of course, list A is the deadlier collective, and they all have one thing in common; they are faster than the average human.

There are those that would throw out the fact that fast Zombies are unrealistic, as the muscles required for locomotion are severely atrophied in the undead as, for the most part, prior to the apocolypse they didn’t get much exercise. Not really a valid argument since we are dealing with a biological anomoly to begin with (Zombies cannot biologically exist, therefore the known laws of biology are not relevant in a discussion of Zombies). However, if you want to get all science-y, then I refer you to the following equation: force=mass x acceleration. Even if Zombies weren’t armed with an insatiable urge to rip open your abdomen and feast on your entrails, a fast Zombie can generate enough force to knock you on your ass. Not so their shambling cousins.

In short, if it can’t catch you, it can’t kill you. And as M. Night Shalaman has shown us, even the wind can be outrun. What chance does a shambling mass of undead flesh have? In the case of running Zombie versus walking Zombie, speed kills.


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The Great Debates of Horror: Walking Zombies vs Running Zombies (Pro Walkers)

Author: Xander Kane

Posted by: Root Rot


The Walking Zombie

Zombies have been around in cinema for quite some time now. We have seen an evolution in the way they have been portrayed on film. One of the biggest changes is the speed in which they move. Well, it is time to pick a side people. You can’t lean on both sides of the fence. So, I am here to set the record straight on which is better. For me it is an obvious choice, one that requires little or no thought. For those of you unsure on the side you take, I will prove with these 10 reasons that walking zombies are far superior to these running zombie impostors.

1. Because of their slow melodic movement they have the ability to come from anywhere. No place is safe!

2. I can run from walking zombies. If I am in the zombie apocalypse you bet your sweet ass I am making a run for it. If those running fools were around I would not stand a chance. That’s right guys I am all about self preservation.

3. They are rotting fucking corpses; it does not make sense for them to run. Rigor mortis is a bitch.

4. There is no hurry for them because they know they will eventually get you with numbers. You will let your guard down eventually and they will be there to rip your guts out and eat them like an all you can eat buffet.

5. The low guttural sounds they make are much more terrifying than the wild screaming banshees that we will call the runners.

6. When the zombies are running it gives an action movie vibe. I feel like Jet Li is going to come out and go ape shit on them. Zombies belong in a horror film leave those running bastards in the theater lobby with the Twitards!

7. Walking zombies are relentless. You could shoot both their legs and one of their arms they will crawl after you still. The running ones take a shot and flop like it’s a damn world cup match?

8. They are not gluttonous. They eat your flesh with care, not by ripping every square inch of your body wasting much of your edible insides. You have heard the old saying “waste not, want not”.

9. If I were a zombie I would definitely be a walking zombie. If we were all running would the slowest ones starve? With walking zombies there is no clear advantage for any of us. Wouldn’t you want to help your population to sustain life?

10. Why would you go against Romero’s original vision?

Well it looks like this list has come to an end just like your life in the event of a Zombie uprising. Hope you enjoyed the read and now have a better perspective of the walking zombie. If you still choose to side with the runners, and I hope you don’t, the next thing to do is just go back and watch the classics that started it all. You will see how truly terrifying the walkers are.

By: Xander_Kane


Related Witch’s Hat links

Walking Zombies vs Running Zombies (Pro Runners)

Other The Great Debates of Horror post

Other zombie post

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